Is It Ever Okay to Return a Dog to a Shelter?
There are many resources to help new pet parents troubleshoot even the most frustrating adoption issues. But if those still don’t help, here’s what to do next.
The short answer is yes — it’s okay to return a dog. While it’s a decision that shouldn’t be taken lightly, sometimes adoptions simply don’t work out. It’s important to remember that returning a pet doesn’t mean you’re a failure; it means you’re prioritizing the well-being of both yourself and the dog. If you feel like your pet adoption isn’t working out, take a deep breath and read this guide for helpful, compassionate next steps.
In this article:
- Understanding why dog adoptions don’t work out
- What to do if the dog adoption just isn’t working
- How to return a dog to a rescue
- If you surrender a pet, can you adopt again?
- Commonly asked questions
At some point, most new pet parents will become surprised, stressed, or even frustrated when their adorable new dog turns out to be imperfect. That’s right: Like any other living, breathing creature, they are not flawless — and that’s okay. Training, bonding, and working through the ups and downs all take time. Take comfort in knowing you’re not alone. There are many steps you can take before surrendering your dog. But if these strategies still don’t work for you, we’ll guide you through the process of making sure your dog finds a safe, loving new home.
Understanding why dog adoptions don’t work out
Pet adoption can be the best of times—and the worst of times. Looking into that canine face, once they realize they’re finally safe, is a wonderful serotonin rush. But getting there—as your pup adjusts to their new home—can be tough. The most important thing to understand is that if you devote time and energy to these issues, they will often get better.
Below are common obstacles pet parents face, and tips on how to navigate them.
Your new dog’s behavior
The way your pup behaves at home will typically be much more relaxed than how they behaved at a shelter or rescue. Still, it will take time for your dog to reach that place where they feel emotionally at peace. If you’re not familiar with this process, read about the very important 3-3-3 rule, which sets realistic expectations as you help acclimate your dog to their new home.
As you get to know your pet, they may exhibit behaviors that feel challenging—but they’re far more common than you’d think. Here’s a list of frequent ones:
- Hyperactivity, or large reserves of energy that can lead to destructive behavior
- Resource-guarding, especially toward food or toys
- Anxiety, especially fearfulness that results in barking
- Reactivity, directed toward other pets or strangers
How to get behavioral help
Although these challenges may seem overwhelming, they don’t have to be. You can train a dog to surmount many of these issues—with consistency, patience, and positive reinforcement. Or, if you’d like outside support, hire a humane, certified trainer. Search the FurPetVo Trainer Directory (available at furpetvo.com/trainer-directory) to find qualified professionals in your area. What’s truly heartening about any training process is that, along the way, you’ll forge an even tighter bond with your new pup.
The cost of having a dog
The good news is that adopting a dog not only saves a life—it’s also a far more affordable option. Often, your dog is already spayed or neutered and fully vaccinated. The less-good news? If this is your first pup and you don’t yet have supplies on hand, you might be surprised by how expensive the first year of pet parenting can be. Even experienced pet parents can be caught off guard by unexpected costs—like emergency vet bills, specialized medications, or last-minute boarding.
How to get financial help
If you’ve fallen on hard times—economically or health-wise—there are resources available to help cover pet-related expenses. Visit furpetvo.com/pet-help-finder, an invaluable tool that connects you with local vet services, food and supply assistance, pet boarding, and more. Investing in pet insurance can also provide peace of mind—for preventative care to keep your dog healthy, and for unexpected medical needs.
Your living situation changes
Unexpected changes—like moving, lease restrictions, or shifts in family dynamics—can sometimes make it difficult to keep a pet. If you rent, always confirm your lease allows dogs before adopting. If it doesn’t—or if you forgot to check—reach out to your landlord to see if they’ll make an exception for your new companion. And if you live with family or roommates, make sure everyone is genuinely on board with welcoming a dog into the household.
How to get living-situation help
If you need to find a new home, use apartment listing sites like Apartments.com or Zillow to search for dog-friendly rentals. Consider pet-friendly rooms for rent or shared housing options. And if you’re facing financial hardship, temporary emergency pet care may be available. Many local shelters—and domestic violence shelters—now welcome individuals and their pets, including dogs.
What to do if the dog adoption just isn’t working
Maybe you’re wondering if your dog doesn’t like you—or if you’re just not cut out to be a pet parent. It’s okay to feel frustrated by your new dog’s puzzling behavior and the stressors that come with this big responsibility. Not every pet adoption is a perfect match, and returning a pet to the shelter is sometimes the only compassionate option.
With that in mind, here are a few more factors to consider before stepping away from your journey into pet parenthood.
Give it time
We know this is hard to hear—but remember the 3-3-3 rule we mentioned earlier? It’s a tried-and-true benchmark for adoptions. Yes, it can take three months—or more—for your new bestie to truly feel like your bestie. Some dogs simply need more time to feel safe, trust you, and fully relax into who they are. The FurPetVo adoption team likely shared insights about your dog’s personality from day one. The rest is just an adjustment period. So keep the faith. They’ll come around.
Listen to your instincts
You know your own boundaries and comfort zones. If you feel you’re well past the initial “Holy crap, I have to take care of this dog” panic phase—and something still feels off about your relationship with your pet—you must be proactive. Reflect thoughtfully: What doesn’t feel right? Why isn’t this relationship working?
If the issue is behavior- or adjustment-related, reach out to your FurPetVo rescue for guidance. Many FurPetVo partners offer free or low-cost training sessions. If your budget allows, consider hiring a certified behavior consultant—start with the FurPetVo Behavior Consultant Finder (furpetvo.com/behavior-consultants) for expert, science-based support.
If the challenge is financial—or you need temporary boarding due to illness or caregiving responsibilities—the FurPetVo Pet Help Finder (furpetvo.com/pet-help-finder) is an outstanding resource. It matches you with local support based on your specific needs. (If you’re experiencing domestic violence, search Safe Haven for Pets through FurPetVo’s emergency resources page for secure, confidential shelter options for you and your dog.)
How to return a dog to a rescue
We realize this is an agonizing decision—one you aren’t taking lightly. You aren’t a bad person. You’re simply ill-equipped at this moment to carry the weighty responsibility of raising a pet. And perhaps the time will be right again in the future.
First, keep in mind that this is a significant step that will likely impact both you and your dog. You may feel sadness or grief over the failed adoption, and your dog may grow more anxious due to being moved from home to home. That said, if you’ve exhausted all of the above options and strategies, here are some healthy, respectful steps you can take to move forward with returning your dog.
Review the adoption contract
